The Pros of Living in Italy as an American Expat, an Addendum
Written By: Marian F.
Two days after posting Living as an American Expat in Italy, The Pros and the Cons, I was sitting at a local cafe with Andrew and our close friend drinking coffee and enjoying good conversation. Our friend Mustafa has always been an advocate of mine and even though he may not love reading travel blogs, he always reads this one. How lucky am I to have such a great friend?!
Prior to posting, I had told him how nervous I was about being so open about myself, to really open up to so many people. He told me to do what I felt was the most comfortable, and he and Andrew suggested sending it to my doctor first just to calm my nerves. I did, although it was Christmas Eve the next day and I didn’t expect a quick response.
On Monday, I said to myself “F*ck it, I am posting this thing.” And I did. I didn’t sleep that night.
Fast forward, or rewind to the first paragraph, I was sitting with Andrew and Mustafa at the cafe…He told me he had read my piece and really liked it. He appreciated the openness, I needn’t have been worried about exposing too much, of offending others, and so on. One thing he did point out, was that the cons part was really great to read, and then the pros lost the personal edge. They felt like add-ons, the ‘oh shit, I need to think of good things!’ part.
It’s like he was in my brain, I had felt like that when I was writing them. Andrew had told me I should add more pros to balance out the cons, so I did. But they felt generic. I didn’t have the passion I did in the earlier section. My headspace was stuck in the dumps.
The three of us discussed it and I realized I wanted to write a second part to that post. To share what I do truly care about and love about my experience. That is also an important exercise after all. To look at the positives, the bright side. I have to think it is therapeutic and just plain fair to my awesome readers.
So here’s to the good, the positive, the bright and shiny unicorns.
The Pros of Living in Italy as an Expat
Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone
Yikes! Talk about jumping headfirst into the pool when you don’t know if it’s the safe deep end or dangerous shallow end. It may not be the thrill-seeking everyone’s used to seeing on Youtube, but it is seriously an ultimate thrill.
I like being comfortable, cozy, safe. On the other hand, that can be super boring, such a drag at times. I lived in sunny, beautiful, and just plain awesome San Diego, yet I still dreamed of more exotic lands. I would be at work, sitting on a boat in the middle of the ocean, dressed in dive gear, and I would still daydream of living somewhere in Europe. My friend Mike and I would talk about where we had been and where we wanted to go. How cool it would be to live somewhere brand-spanking new.
My other friend and I would choose boats that we would want to live on and sail the world in. We would make up amazing stories of what we would do, who we would be.
Mike dreamed of Mexico or Spain. I couldn’t decide. There were still so many places to see that I couldn’t make up my mind. In the end, I didn’t get to choose–life chose for me. And oh did it choose well.
The dreams became reality. We moved to Italy, a country we had never been to. The ultimate thrill ride, a thrill ride that could go completely wrong or be completely awesome. Not nerve-racking or anything, no big deal.
Okay, so there is a middle ground, and that is where I landed. I have the problem of always looking forward to the next adventure so that I forget to enjoy the one that I am on. I do it with more than just travel as well. As soon as I get a promotion at a job, I am anxious for the next one. I seem to think that I can always do better. Another new year’s resolution: learn to live in the moment.
We live in Italy for god’s sake! Tuscany! Some people only dream of visiting where we get to spend three years of our lives. So I am coming to terms with the fact that I am in a totally awesome country, living an amazing life, and that is because I was daring enough to leave the warm, comfy blankets of the USA and take the deep dive.
I am totally thinking of this as a pro in regards to becoming an expat. The pre-expat drive is something to be proud of, as it is a pro to reach for something outside of your safety zone. It is brave. There are people who don’t venture outside of their home state, and here we are moving across the world. I may have troubles, but in the long run, I am sticking to the fact that making the move itself is a huge pro. Here’s to leaving your comfort zone far behind you and making a new one.
Becoming Part of a New Culture
This is probably on the top of almost every pro list for becoming an expat in Italy or any other foreign country, as it should be. Some countries are harder than others when it comes to breaking into and learning the local culture. Probably ones where you actually speak the language are a lot easier for most people.
I am still learning a lot about the culture of Italy. It changes from region to region, and it is quite a bit different than we may be used to in our home countries. I love spending time at the cafe sipping coffee and/or a Spritz while chatting with friends. It is such a lovely part of the day as people are ending their workday, meeting with family and friends, and just enjoying life.
Taking life slowly, working to live, enjoying your free time without the feeling that you should be working. That is such a great cultural difference, I feel that in the US people are always stressed, anxious, and just always in the work mindset. I was–I was always thinking about work, how to train behaviors, how to be better, and about what was upsetting me.
Now I just have the stress of not having a job, but at the same time, I am able to enjoy my freedom and the new country I landed in. I am learning, I am growing, I am moving towards being able to actually enjoy what is around me and this new culture.
Yeah, there are growing pains. I have been told that the first year is the hardest when living as an expat, and as I come to the end of my first year, I would say that it is hard. On the other hand, it has been eye-opening, exciting, and beautiful.
Exploring Your New Home Is a Huge Pro of Becoming An American Expat
Have you ever traveled somewhere and thought ‘I want to live here, life would be easier?’ Let me be honest, that is just not always the case. Visiting is worlds different from actually living somewhere, especially when it is abroad. You don’t get to just look, enjoy the shiny sides, and then move on to the next glistening rainbow location.
You are stuck with dealing with all of the politics, your health care, the garbage tax, getting functional internet, and residency hoopla. It is super awesome, says no one.
Yet, even with all of the cons and ways to spend your money, at the end of the day you are still somewhere new, a place you have yet to explore and discover. One of the other great things about living here is that you have the gift of TIME, precious time.
You have time to explore the alleyways filled with street art, time to let your dog run in the grass by historic monuments, time to discover. The only downside I have found about having extra time is that you start to put things off thinking there is plenty of…time. Then suddenly you are at the end of your three years and you still haven’t been to Rome, the Dolomites, Pompeii, and you have to scramble to see all that you can.
I do this at the beginning and the end of my long-term ventures. Such as when we first moved here, I had us going somewhere new almost every weekend, and then things started to calm down. I was feeling down, I felt like staying home, laying low. I now try to get us somewhere new or at least somewhere each month. It accommodates our wallets and our desire to explore our new home. Of course, Covid has also kept us at home more than we would like.
I have found that a pro of being an American expat in Italy is the gift of discovery. That’s a big reason we travel to begin with, isn’t it? Wanting to see everything, taste the food, meet new people– these are all big drives to travel. At least they are for me. Now, being an expat in Italy, I can do all of these things for the foreseeable future.
Meeting Non-American Expats and Native Italians
Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against cool American expats, I am sure they are awesome, just like us. The thing is, we have only met one couple from America and they are here for military duty and we rarely see them. All of our other friends and acquaintances are either Italian or expats from other countries.
I love getting to meet new friends from all over the world. It is an awesome bonus and something that is new for me. We have friends from France, Great Britain, Brazil, the Netherlands, and Turkey, and we get to have a taste of each of their cultures and languages.
A pro to living in Italy or other European countries is the incredible access you have to other nearby countries, which means there is quite a bit of diversity. Plus, Pisa is a university town which draws students in from all over. Italy in general is such a loved place.
Making friends from new places is a fantastic pro of moving to Italy and becoming an American expat.
Learning a New Language
‘Wait! You said the opposite in your last post!’ Yeah, I know, I had a whole thing about how fricking difficult it is for me. At the end of the day though, it is super cool to learn a new language.
It is hard for me to look back to the beginning, back when I knew a couple of words like ‘ciao’, and that’s really it, actually. Now I can understand a bit and actually know a lot more than I give myself credit for. I may not be as far along as I would like, but at least I am trying and working at it. I even had a lesson on Christmas Day for heaven’s sake.
Wouldn’t it be cool if you could just absorb information that you read or hear and never forget it? I really wish I had that superpower, but instead, I am rewinding to my days at university when I had to study, study HARD. I got frustrated then, but at least I worked my butt off to get decent grades (organic chemistry still kicked my butt, it hurt).
Although it can be overwhelming and it can be near impossible to communicate with some people, it is still awesome to be learning a new language. Sometimes I feel like giving up and just plain quitting, but I am NOT a quitter, I remind myself. I WILL prevail! Then we will move somewhere and I will have to start all over, but then I will know three languages, even cooler.
So another pro of becoming an American expat in Italy is that you get to learn Italian. One of the most romantic languages in the world. This reminds me that I still need to practice my Italian today.
The Pros of Living in Italy as an American Expat Conclusion
I could go on with the pros of living in Italy, like eating pizza and pasta, drinking fantastic wine, traveling by train across the country, the incredible history, and so on. But I think those are a bit obvious, the things that draw people here in the first place.
There are other pros to living in Italy as an expat, reasons that are personal, reasons that will enhance your personal growth. Pros that give us more perspective about the world as a whole. This experience has changed my life, helped me to learn more about myself, and I am sure the following years will continue to shine as well as have their times of gloom. This is life. But this is life in Italy.
